She arrived from warm, well-lit Europe to renew documents, and within a few hours, she was hearing explosions in the dark, cold Kyiv. Zhanna, 55, a resident of Kyiv, has lived in France for years. This winter, she returned to Ukraine for personal reasons. But reality caught up with her immediately: almost as soon as she arrived, Russian ballistic missile attacks began.
This winter, temperatures dropped to minus 25 degrees Celsius. At the same time, Ukraine was hit by nearly 300 Russian strikes on energy infrastructure.
The goal of these attacks is not only to cause suffering to civilians but also to force Ukraine to accept capitulation during so-called “peace negotiations,” another weapon of the Kremlin.
Today, Zhanna shares the story of someone who experienced the difference between “knowing about war” and “being in it.”
Europeans discuss war over aperitifs, then forget by dinner
“I have lived in Europe for several years. There, people know about the war — they see it in the news, discuss it between coffee and aperitifs, sympathize sincerely but briefly. A second later, they forget and go on living their lives. You can talk about it over an aperitif, but not at dinner, so as not to spoil your appetite.
I was sure I was ready. We were ready for shelling and blackouts, but not for the cold. Being ready in your head is not the same as enduring it in your body. In the 21st century, in the capital of a large country, it can be so cold indoors that a person cannot warm up for weeks.
Cold here is not just temperature. It slowly seeps under your clothes, into your bones, into your thoughts. You stop feeling safe. Long periods in darkness create a sense of insecurity, anxiety, and uncertainty inside."
"Ready in your head isn’t the same as enduring in your body"
One day, I had to leave the city on business. Snow covered the roads, the internet went down, the GPS stopped working, and the streetlights on the highway were out. The world narrowed to a narrow strip in front of the headlights. And then the siren sounded. I felt anxiety, fear, and the realization that anything could happen.
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When I finally got home, I only wanted warmth. But at home, there was nothing to warm up with. The heating did not work. There was no water. Even washing was a problem. At such moments, anger comes over you.
So, as an understanding that it is temporary and we will survive and win anyway. Daily life breaks down into small trials. Personal hygiene, cooking, and washing dishes become points of tension."
They don’t romanticize war here, and the most valuable resource isn’t electricity or water
"I looked at the people around me and realized: people are strong and resilient, I am proud of our people. Here, it really seems that there is a chasm between two worlds: until you live this life, you will never understand.
The most valuable resource is not electricity or water, but willpower, a sense of humor, and faith in people. People grit their teeth and live their lives despite everything. Here, they don’t romanticize war. They just say: “We must hold on, spring will come soon.
And the only thing I would now tell Europeans: Such abuse of a people should not exist in the modern world. Ukrainians can endure a lot. But they were not born to survive. They want to live and create a world."
