Russians are paying sorcerers to enchant their cars into using less gas. Ukraine's Foreign Intelligence Service (SVR) reports that as Russia's fuel crisis deepens, non-standard offers to reduce a car's gasoline consumption are gaining popularity.
In many regions, the agency said, drivers queue around the clock to fill just 10 to 20 liters, and quality is no longer even part of the conversation.
The Kremlin, "where officially everything is under control," is trying to hold the situation with norms, limits, schedules, restrictions, coupons, and other post-Soviet attributes, the SVR said. Ordinary Russians are left hoping for a miracle, which is where the wizards come in.
Sorcerers open price list
Prices on the black market run about $3.20 to $6.40 a liter. Against that, the SVR notes, the magic looks almost affordable.
For $19, a client can get a "wax pouring" to remove negative energy. For about $90, a runic array. For about $115, a search of the car's interior for "magic needles" was conducted.
"For advanced users," the SVR wrote, nearly $190 buys a "Bear Paw" amulet, and around $205 a full magic ritual with salt and a gold ornament. The last one supposedly reduces fuel consumption and even "attracts" gasoline or diesel into the tank.
There is one mandatory condition the sorcerers insist on: tell no one about the ritual, or the magic will not work. It is a clause that also makes the service impossible to disprove.
Crisis magic is standing in for
The rituals are a symptom. The disease is a fuel system Ukraine has spent 2026 taking apart.
Ukraine's General Staff reported that 42.74% of Russian oil refining was offline as of 4 July, with $13.5 billion in industry losses since August 2025. Rationing has reached Siberia, thousands of kilometers from the front, jumping region to region, even where no drone has struck. Russia has banned gasoline exports, permitted the sale of lower-grade Euro-3 fuel to stretch supply, and begun importing gasoline by sea, a first for one of the world's largest oil exporters.
