The term “hybrid” now applied in Orwellian fashion by Russian propagandists to everything they want people to accept as just the opposite of what it is has taken on ever more absurd forms, and no one has punctured the ridiculousness and dangerousness of this Kremlin code word better than Moscow commentator Svetlana Naumova.
On the Kasparov.ru portal, she says she is not waiting until the Duma passes a law making criticism of the president a crime but has decided “to subject herself to self-censorship” by not mention the name of the Kremlin leader and by hurrying to declare that “any coincidence with real people and events is coincidental.”
“And so,” she begins, “once upon a time on the earth there appeared a hybrid president of a hybrid country. Everything in this country as we know from the first tales was hybrid, that is, as it was supposed to be but was not in fact: hybrid war, hybrid citizens, hybrid laws, hybrid food, and even hybrid truth.”
“And the president in this hybrid country also was hybrid because he was chosen each time in hybrid elections in which the hybrid people took part but only in the role of quite un-hybrid sheep. A very different group, hybrid oligarchs who were supposed to be entrepreneurs and bankers but in fact were ordinary thieves, in fact named the president.”
“It is terrible to imagine,” Naumova continues, “but this president had a life which was also hybrid. First a hybrid childhood with a hybrid family … then hybrid studies in a un-hybrid university … and further the hybrid defense of a hybrid dissertation” which was assembled from “un-hybrid American texts.”
After getting his education, the hybrid president “as it were occupied an important administrative post but in fact simply was attached to the briefcase of one un-hybrid boss.” But because of this attachment, even then this “hybrid” was able to steal millions of un-hybrid dollars.
“But because this case took place in a hybrid country with a hybrid legal system, then instead of landing in an un-hybrid jail, he became a hybrid president,” Naumova says. “Naturally all this hybrid president had was hybrid: hybrid pay (as if small but in fact large enough for luxury villas and expensive watches), hybrid ratings (ostensibly at record levels but in fact as thought up by compromised hybrid PR specialists).”
Moreover, Naumova continues, he has “a hybrid opposition (which appears to speak against the hybrid regime but in fact tries to fit in to the un-hybrid feeding trough of the hybrid masters of life) and hybrid allies (as it were partners of the hybrid president but when his back his turned, they may use against him an un-hybrid knife).”
“But despite all his un-hybrid wealth gained by unbearable hybrid labor and hybrid wars by which the hybrid president tried to distract attention of the hybrid slaves from his own un-hybrid crimes … the normal un-hybrid world did not want in any way to recognize the hybrid greatness of the hybrid dictator.”
Moreover, “the un-hybrid leaders of the un-hybrid world powers shy away from the hybrid present as from the plague. But the un-hybrid people laugh over the eternally rising from its knees hybrid country with its wild hybrid values and ties.” That infuriates the hybrid president and he begins to fear “not only his un-hybrid enemies but his own hybrid friends.”
And consequently on the horizon appears an anything but hybrid military tribunal; and “it is becoming clear to all that even an army of hybrid guards will not be in a position to save from un-hybrid justice the un-hybrid criminal generated by a hybrid country.” And consequently, just like any other tale, this one will come to an end.
That is especially true in this case “because hybrid truth can be truth only for hybrid people, but for everyone else it remains a lie and a deception. Hybrid food can feed only hybrid people and only on paper, but hybrid war can and does kill not only hybrid but real people.” And ultimately that means that the hybrid leader and even his hybrid country will collapse – when they come into final contact with un-hybrid reality.
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